Evolutionary psych and mating from a Phd.

Read this awesome post in which a female is reviewing a book concerning Evolutionary Psych and mating written by a Phd. in Psychology (UT Austin).

A review of The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating
by David M. Buss
The evolutionary truth about relationships.

Reviewed by: Jennifer Santiago About Jennifer Santiago

"Forget Mars and Venus. Dr. Buss has the REAL truth about love, marriage and sex. In what is arguably the most fascinating book ever written about male/female relationships, Buss provides empirical explanations for all of our conflicts. "Discord and dissolution in mating relationships are typically seen as signs of failure," writes Buss in the opening chapter. "They are regarded as distortions or perversions of the natural state of married life. They are thought to signal personal inadequacy, immaturity, neurosis, failure of will, or simply poor judgment in the choice of a mate. This view is radically wrong. Conflict in mating is the norm and not the exception." Buss, an evolutionary psychologist, asserts that all of our dating, mating and relating behaviors are hardwired. Each gender has its own set of mating strategies that remain unchanged since the dawn of time, and in fact work to guarantee the survival of the species. "Because women in our evolutionary past risked enormous investment as a consequence of sex, evolution favored women who were highly selective about mates," he says. In other words, because a single sexual dalliance can lead to pregnancy and the rearing of offspring, women evolved to demand characteristics in a mate that made it more likely for the mate to stick around. Women needed a mate with adequate resources, and the generosity to share them. Women grew to prefer men who were industrious and ambitious, dependable, stable, intelligent, physically powerful, healthy, and faithful. In short, women sought- and still seek- men who will make outstanding partners in the task of raising children. The evolutionary mating strategies of men are, as might be expected, radically different. The evolutionary goal of men is to spread their seed around, if you will. It is a man's evolutionary imperative to leave behind as many offspring as possible. Men's preference for young, attractive women has evolved from their ability to identify healthy, reproductively viable mates who can provide them with robust offspring. However, the single most important criteria that a woman must meet, a finding that was universal in a study of 37 cultures, is sexual fidelity. Because men are expected to invest their resources in their offspring, it's essential that there be no question about their paternity. Even today, men prefer wives with less premarital sexual experience: "Contemporary studies show that the single best predictor of extramarital sex is premarital sexual permissiveness," Buss reports. So while 21st century men can no longer reasonably expect a virgin bride, a value is still place on the relative chastity of the bride-to-be. Not convinced that any of this is true or applicable? "Sexual strategies do not require conscious planning or awareness," Buss says. In fact, "most human sexual strategies are best carried out without the awareness of the actor." Buss bases his theories on a cross-cultural study of more than 10,000 respondents, and by the time you get to the last chapter, you'll be a believer in what he has to say. As an undergraduate, I took a course in evolutionary psychology, and Buss's book was assigned reading. Never have I torn through an assignment more quickly. With each page, I found myself saying, "Yes, yes! That makes so much sense! That explains everything!" Buss does an outstanding job of illustrating how the mating strategies of primitive peoples evolved into the behaviors and preferences of modern humans and how little these strategies have really changed. A must-read for anyone fascinated by human psychology as well as those just seeking a little insight into inter-gender dynamics. "

Click here to view the entire website and to find out more about the author.
http://booksiloved.com/10/Evolution_of_Desire.html

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Shattering beliefs about social dynamics

Not too long ago, I was known as “Mr. Nice guy.” During the first couple of years of my college experience, I noticed that my college professors would treat me like a doormat, but the most interesting revelation came when female professors, whom I initially thought that as a result of my being nice, supplicating and “generic” (a WUSS) would have led them to help me. WRONG! If anything, I learned that the “college professors” who were supposedly above making generalized and subjective judgments, like the public. My entire paradigm, completely shifted when I discovered that the same professors who were so quick to “blow me out” (rejection), quickly performed grading favors, extra study materials, etc. In today's age, there exist an unparalleled benefit that comes with the cultivated skill(s) with women, the following:

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